saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
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