I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
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