another moral hangover. fuck.
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
false alarm, still single
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize