508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
