Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize
