don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Church boner. Awkwardddd
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
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