Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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