Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Randomize
