theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
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