Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Randomize
