Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
