He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
