Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
Randomize
