she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
birth control should be required to get into college
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
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