Capitaan dildo arrescate!
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
