Ambien. No doubt about it.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
