Is it because I queefed?
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
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