thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
