Need sex. Gaining weight.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
