I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
