I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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