yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
