it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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