my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Randomize
