and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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