Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I think I am morally bankrupt
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
