I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize