before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
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