So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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