we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
