ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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