i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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