take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
These People Made Expensive Mistakes That They’ll Regret Forever
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
Things The Opposite Sex Just Doesn’t Understand
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.