Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
23 Bosses Confess The Craziest Thing They’ve Seen An Employee Do
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
19 People Confess What It’s Like To Have Sex With Someone That Is Transitioning
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
My breasts were aching with rage.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late