They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Randomize