I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
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