She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
My balls are so social today.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Randomize
