dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize
