i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
