no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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