after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
