i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
