I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
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