this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Randomize
