question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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