I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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