best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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