It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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