the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
