Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
Randomize
