I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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