Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
