Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
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